Sexual and Reproductive Health and Rights

The Curse

Last night, a friend of mine said something to me that both scared the living daylights out of me and resonated somewhere in my brain…it’s one of those ideas that, at first, I thought only stoners had, but when I sat and said it to myself it hit hard.

He said that homosexuality was a curse.

Not the kind of demon possessions or hedonistic vices that religious groups talk about. Just a regular, everyday societal curse, like a mental disorder or saying that you like to watch ’18 and Pregnant’.

And, now that I think about it, although the wording’s harsh, I think he’s absolutely right. In fact, I have always believed that.

We try to avoid that wording, because it feels like we ourselves are putting LGBT people in that place, but it’s not the same. What it is, rather, is acceptance of the kind of society we live in. Plain and simple, from a societal level, people of alternative sexualities are cursed. They do not get to live a normal life because of their sexuality. Therefore, that’s the curse.

Think about it this way. If life is a stage and we are the actors, heterosexual men and women ‘perform’ their sexuality based on assumptions in the story. We do not meet the characters earlier on in this part of the play, but we assume that they are heterosexual, that they are interested in sex and that they would defend their sexuality from whatever can be perceived as an attack. All of these are normal assumptions. Homosexuals, however, don’t get to make similar assumptions. In fact, they have to make the exact same ones – that people they find interesting or attractive might very well be straight, would not want to be intimate with them and defend themselves against an ‘attack’ on their sexuality. They, therefore, end up on stage as imitators of the heterosexual characters or as tragic heroes in their own play about sexuality. Their tragic flaw? Being gay, lesbian, bisexual, any-other-sexual… It’s the curse given to them by the gods, that affects how they continue throughout the play.

Tell me if you disagree, but for a great many LGBT people their sexuality is a bone of contention with society’s expectations of sex and gender. And understanding that, as well as figuring out how to explain this to others, is critical to how we deal with LGBT issues in society.


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